Two days ago, I found myself walking to work in tears. No idea why. I just couldn't stop crying.
Yes...it may have been a hormonal thing, and in hindsight, I think I probably should have called in sick, turned around and headed home, but I thought that work would 'cure' whatever was bugging me.
Later that night, the feeling had subsided a little, but there was still this 'nagging' in the back of my head.
I think I may have previously mentioned that I'm now living on my own for the first time in my life, and I've been having some anxiety alternating with mild depression...not sure if that's what's causing the tears, I'm thinking that it might have something to do with the whole "empty nest" thing. I can't think of what else it might be. Don't get me wrong; I'm happy in my skin, in my place, but I can't shake this feeling that I should be doing 'more'...that I should have 'more'...that I should be...'more'.
Anyone else feel this way?
Logical thinking tells me that all is fine, that I'm being...I'm not even sure what I'm being, but I still can't shake this weirdness. I'm in good health, no issues there.
Maybe it's because the kids aren't the center of my universe anymore; I get to think about myself after twenty-some-odd years of thinking about and doing for other people. It's really strange not to have to anymore.
I find myself having to stop and take a deep breath every so often a few times a week, just to stay in check.
What I'm feeling isn't stress; it's anxiety, but I've started doing yoga, getting some breathing exercises as well as meditation, and it's all helping.
Part of my problem is that I'm impatient. I've never had patience. Now that the time in my life that I've been waiting for is here, I want everything NOW.
